A Mother's Prayer

Lord You say that you want all of me
And yet I don't have anymore of me left
I am constantly taking care of everyone else
That there isn't anything left to spare
I try to take a moment to feel Your peace
But then my attention is taken away
Someone needs a diaper, a cup of juice, a kiss on a boo boo
There's a pile that needs to be cleaned, a mouth that needs to be fed
My attention is pulled into every single direction
By the end of the day I fall into bed
Exhausted by the everyday routine
My guitar longs for me to play You a song
To remember the way things once were
When I could give You all of my attention
I could feel You in every breath of my being
I could lay in the floor and meditate on being with You
How I long for the days when life was so simple
I get so caught up in the needs of everyone that I think that
the days fly by and can I even remember when I last prayed
You must think I am way too easily distracted
When I really want to sit down at Your feet
Hear the things that make my heart leap
My soul is so thirsty, famished from missing Your presence
But I care for the little ones
You care for the little ones
You gently remind me that everything I do is seen
Every small kind gesture, every time I breathe a silent prayer
You hear me, and You see me
I am not working in vain
I praise You through my everyday chaos
I see You in the eyes of my children
I worship you cleaning up a mess, laughing with my children
You tell me to stop and see You in the small things, the wind in the trees
The sunshine through the window, the rain patters on the roof
Even if I think I'm far from You,
You are so interwoven into my life
I take You everywhere I go

More Pictures and Video!

I took so awesome pictures of the 2 kids and had to post them.

I'll consider this one Benny's 3 month old picture. He's such a doll!

Here's one of Lily being a super cutie!

Lily's rockin' outfit she picked out herself.

Lily figured out all on her own how to swing herself so I had to get a video of it! She's such a big girl and I'm so proud of her.

Lily and Benny

We went to Benny's 2 month checkup and found out that he's growing beautifully and is very healthy. He weighs 13 lbs 6 oz putting him in the 75th percentile on weight! All that Mama's milk is doing him some good! He's the cutest little chunk of a baby. He measures at 23 1/4 inches putting him in the 50th percentile on height. I can't believe how fast he's growing! He's gained 6 pounds in almost 3 months. He's changing as fast as he's growing.

Some little tidbits about Benny:
-He loves being talked to, he'll talk back to you and smile real big.
-He loves being naked. Diaper changes and baths are his favorite!
-He had his first real laugh this month. Mommy's heart melted.
-He enjoys playing with toys. He kicks his legs when he's excited.
-He smiles all the time, he's a very happy baby.
-He hold his head up very well and loves to look around to see what is going on.


Here's a video of Benny talking and smiling. Don't mind my high pitched voice in the background.

Lily, Benny, and I took a train ride to Salt Lake for Benny's dr. appointment. I was a little nervous at first but ended up having a great time. Lily was psyched about the ride since we haven't ridden the train since December. It turned out to be fun and we might do it more often so we can meet Daddy after work in Salt Lake.

Have you ever seen a more excited 3 year old?

Benny is enjoying himself too.

Lily's changing a lot lately also. I can't believe she'll be 4 this summer!
-She sings all the time, her favorite songs are the ABC song, pat a cake, and the clean up song.
-She is learning how to write her letters. We've started a huge preschool workbook and she loves to learn new things.
-Lily loves to play with friends. She isn't shy at all anymore and will talk up a storm to just about anyone who will listen.
-Her speech is getting more and more understandable and she learns new words every day.
-She is very good at going to bed at night now. I don't have to sit with her anymore and she doesn't fuss about going to bed at night.
-She loves to be read to and adores the library's story-time. It's her favorite activity of the week.
-She's getting more and more independent and loves to be Mommy's and Daddy's little helper.

Lily's pillowcase dress made by her Grammy

Here's a video of Lily dancing (Tali's in the background too)

Well I'm ready for summer to start, ready to plant a garden and have endless days of playing outside, hiking, biking, and park-days. I'm ready for BBQ's, soaking up the sun, going to the pool, and playing with friends.

Whirlwind

My life is like a whirlwind swirling all around me
Every day flies by in the everyday-ness
The responsibilities surround me
I cannot even remember deeper things
I am stuck on the surface of a deep deep ocean
That is begging me to dive in
To remember the amazing Love that completes me
I feel stuck in this routine and I cannot catch my breath
I want to sit down at Your feet and worship You
To be reminded that I am not in control
Take my flighty, wavering heart
Draw it near to You
Calm the storm of my soul
So I can feel the sweet heavenly waters pour over me
Revive me, complete me, and make me Your own.